Au Fait, 2012
Digital Output, Processed.
***
Secretary of State Rodham Clinton wore a headband to an official event. Oh such an informal accessory to a formal event! What was she thinking? Or clearly, she wasn’t thinking. I have to admit, she looked beautiful with poise; elegant with confidence; and graceful with femininity. Yes, I did say femininity. A part of me smiled inside. From her much-talked-about pant suits to her dominating personality, we are quick to lump her into a group full of women politicians in the upper echelons of society which include Margaret Thatcher, Benazir Bhutto, and Angela Merkel. This group stands apart from the fashion savvy first ladies of world (Lady Diana Cooper, Queen Noor, and Michelle Obama) who dress in fashion perfection-like attire (which we absolutely adore) in essence to promote the values of their husband’s power and platform. What would Cynthia Enloe say? She would argue that it is, in fact, these diplomatic wives who are the true promoters of diplomatic dialogue and friendship as they host impeccable tea-gatherings and host fabulous dinner-parties in order to further the nationalist efforts in the international community.
The au fait of third wave feminism have ingrained our female minds with the idea that everything is, in fact possible. We can simultaneously enjoy being traditional and outgoing; self conscious and independent; romantic and ambitious; hardworking and vulnerable; and creative and smart. Perhaps it is alright to agree to disagree and there is a certain beauty in the miss-matched sequence that binds our consciousness.
As young girls our mothers, having sacrificed little pleasures of life because of perils of joint family systems, radical islamicalization of women’s laws, constant dependency on a male, and living in the shadows in society; taught us that we can be anyone we wish and do anything we want. They pushed us to own ourselves, our thoughts, our emotions, and our ideas…while simultaneously sharing the romance of Elizabeth Bennet, Anarkali, and Juliet. Being encouraged to find ourselves, our truths, our wants; and to explore the possibilities of creating our own worlds…and that anything and everything is without our grasps, we imagined a world of justice and equality. On our way to chase the glass ceiling, we were taught that it is necessary to foster our own individual talents and if perhaps we don’t like something, than simply change it.
They taught us to be courageous and have faith in our own abilities. To stand up for ourselves and others. To be honest and pure at heart. And to not be controlled. Perhaps, the qualities they lacked, they made sure to instill in us so that we were self-sufficient. With this training, we transitioned into teenage girls looking for adventure and wanting to conquer the world, (perhaps, in my case even vowed to save the world) to young women dedicated to making a difference and making sure to have a fun, passionate and well experienced along the way. To own our own journey. To live our own story. To learn to fend for ourselves without emotional reliance on a boyfriend or a fiancé or a husband. And therefore, we now have certain ideals and expectations from the men in our society; however fabricated in our own subconscious.
We, now, find refuge in three tiered skirts and thick rimmed glasses.
We, now, are the product of our mother’s feminist generation.
We, now, realize we want it all – the education, the career (of saving the world), organic home-cooked meals on the dinner table, and the representation of sheer elegance.
We, now, understand that it is, indeed, possible at the expense of absolutely nothing.
We take our direction from the grandmothers, mothers, daughters, and sisters; from the Mukhtar Mai’s of our times; from the Amelia Earhart’s of our times; from the Ann Frank’s of our times; from the Mother Theresa’s of our times; from the Mia Hamm’s of our times; form the Fatima Jinnah’s of our times. We are starting to own ourselves; for each other and for all the women. We are comfortable in our femininity and our roles outside of the traditional gender constructs. We are the new feminist generation. If Hillary Clinton can engage in her femininity and proudly gallant it by deconstructing the social paranoia, perhaps it is a new era for the rest of us.
We, women, have evolved in our own capacities as we now define our own au fait destiny. The question is, have the men caught up to us?
